Sunday, August 2, 2009

Brother Al's Traveling Ecopalypse Show

“Camp-meeting” by H. Bridport. (ca. 1829)
Brother Al's Traveling Ecopalypse Show
Establishment Clause?... Anyone?... Anyone?...

Once upon a long, long time,

before the age of Man,

The Earth was green

and quite pristine,

an Eden wonderland.

Far wiser creatures roamed The Earth

pre-Man's ascendancy.

Tooth, and claw,

and tarpits all

just lived in harmony.

Fireball, and earthquake,

glacier ice, volcano flame

would rip and tear

The Ecosphere,

yet Eden stayed the same.

Then Man, the evil wretch, appeared

with greed, and carbon sin,

arrogant stride,

and market pride;

Man did poor Eden in.

But from patrician pampered privilege

a Prophet answered the plea

a Promised One,

Senator's son,

(failed doc divinity).

He collated contextless graphs

and false cause photo clips

and made a go

of a roadshow

preaching Apocalypse.

He soon was Senator, like Dad,

and even became Veep.

2000 went,

lost President,

and went off the end deep.

Then took the roadshow to the screen

to mass evangelize,

and pushed the vid

upon the kids

and won The Nobel Prize.

Though infidels and heretics

denied The Truth they heard

and dared profess

no consensus,

The Prophet preached The Word.

'Til in the halls of Congress,

His Gospel at last obeyed,

by their will

came Holy Bill

for Carbon Cap and Trade.

So rejoice, all ye brethren,

for His Glory is at hand,

His Sacraments

for low footprints

will justly rule the land:

light bulbs, trees, toilet paper,

hybrid cars, and compost piles,

windmill spins,

recycle bins,

and eco-marxist smiles.

Soy milk, organic honey,

Green Delights now all in store;

Liberty stilled,

with no Free Will,

The Holy Church of Gore.